Sunday, January 1, 2017

2017 is for Tacos and Stand-Up

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I am a New Year's Resolution girl. I like reflection. I like thought. I like goals, both setting and achieving. I like resolutions. I make and break resolutions. I just really enjoy the feeling of the new year...a seemingly fresh start, blank slate, empty canvas.

2016 was a real bitch

I should have known it would be - it started with finding out the guy I was dating was both in the hospital and also not as single as I believed him to be (fucker). When you text the guy you've been dating for 10 months at midnight, saying happy new year and you wish he was there with you instead of at home alone, not feeling well, and then at 2:00 in the morning you get a text back that says how about you don't text my boyfriend like that...you should just know, this year may not be the winner.

Clearly I should have anticipated all of the celebrity deaths and Donald Trump's win.

Anyway, as I said, 2016 was a bitch - in many, many ways.


However, 2016 was also full of a lot of excitement, fun, and positive vibes - it wasn't all bad.

Things that were fantastic in 2016:
* MCP sold and I got the fuck off the property just in time to not have a legitimate mental breakdown.
* I lived with my best friend for six months, and at the end of it we were still best friends. The same cannot be said for our cats, who were not - and are not - friends.
* I rented her room to a really great roommate for the second half of the year - the best part was how much of the rent he paid so I was able to trade in my pickup for a band new car.
* Work advancement. Always exciting.
* I spent a lot of time with my grandma and didn't have to see anyone else in my family in order to do so. More importantly, I finally came to a place where I was at peace with the loss of the family I had, and have been able to accept the lack of relationships I have left.
* I moved into my own apartment, not on a rent discount, not on the property I work at, and on a real lease...for the first time in a long time. And I basically haven't worn pants since I got the keys.
* I spent Thanksgiving at the beach, boycotting - and hanging out with my two favorite people, Stace and Blake.
* I went to the beach several times, and also to Bend. And also to Arizona and Las Vegas, and even Alaska!
* My best friend got pregnant. And I got to go to her ultrasound last week...and hear baby's healthy, happy little heart beat.
* I didn't get pregnant.
* The sex was good.
* In the name of not letting Donald Baby Hands Trump run my life, I learned a lot about politics. Even though it infuriated me, I like that I have a lot of knowledge now.
* I had a lot of work-life balance, which I haven't had in a few years. It was like I had a life outside of property management!
* Juno...well, just her existence in general.

I spent the last week of 2016 on vacation, which is always a fantastic idea. I had a lot of lazy days, slept in, hung out with friends, and even did some adulting - mostly though, I was lazy. Yesterday was a fun end to 2016 - I slept in and ran a few errands, bought a fantastic set of chairs and yellow side table, and deep cleaned my apartment before it was time to go out and ring in 2017. Somewhere in there I also spent an insane amount of time trying to get my 2016 memories out of my memory jar so I can reuse the jar for 2017...when I made the jar, I didn't pay enough attention to how tiny the neck was, so getting the papers out involved chopsticks, tweezers, scissors, and tape. But I did it! Juliana and Patrick came over later in the evening, and we had champagne in my fancy new champagne flutes - for which I paid 3 bucks at Home Goods (woot). The plan was to each have a glass, so of course instead we went through two bottles. We started the night with appetizers and shuffleboard at Brickhouse with Eric and Kattie, then they dropped us off at Main Event, where we spent the rest of the night drinking, taking shots (okay well that was just me), dancing, and hanging out with strangers. There were of course a couple creepy dudes in the crowd - someone actually snapped my bra, which was interesting - but overall it was a fun crowd with a great vibe, and everyone had a lot of fun. We even met several really nice girls, which is always a surprise since girls are, you know, nasty bitches just in general. There was a girl there with mermaid blue and purple hair...I don't know her name, but I gave her my number. Because, well, because tequila.

After midnight but before 2:00, we got an Uber back to my place, where I promptly threw up a few times, shed my clothes throughout the apartment (as I always do when I'm drunk), and fell asleep, phone in hand, after discussing my future Panda Express order via text message with a fella.

I know, I know...I'm so awesome, I just can't even explain it.
Oh hey, you're a cool guy...wanna know what I plan to order to cure the hangover I will definitely have tomorrow??
Mmm, string bean chicken and half chow mein, half white rice. I can't wait.

This is certainly unrelated to why I'm single.

Because I am feeling blissfully positive about 2017, I am choosing to believe that he found it charming. Obviously.

As I've said before, I love the beginning of a new year...even though I hate hangovers. I like reflecting on my prior year, and I like making plans for the upcoming 365 days. I try to keep things open-ended and not too strict, because why make impossible resolutions?? Like, here's a list of ways to let myself down this year! Instead I try to make resolutions I can actually stick to and win with.


The only definitive (read: numbers) goal I am setting for 2017 is helping Juno lose 2 pounds. She's ridiculous, and it's so cute that she's fat, but I do want her to be healthy, and I do not want her to get diabetes. So far she's on a food that costs me like $1000 a year because it's made out of solid gold, but we're working on her moving more, just in general. She is always hungry, so I make her do a couple laps up and down the hallway before I set her dish down - yes, seriously. It's funny for me, and I think it counts as cardio for her, considering how aggressively she runs at food.

I'm still thinking about what specifics I want to focus on for the year - normally I'd spend the first nursing my hangover and writing down my resolutions while eating my Panda Express. But today I was distracted by discovering stand up comedy on Netflix and watching a movie with the aforementioned dude who understood my passion for string bean chicken.


But in general, I have some things to focus on related to health and fitness, financial stability, work-life balance, and career growth - as well as just an overall desire to meet more people and enjoy my time more. I made a point this year to try new things more often - and I feel like I did a good job overall; I want to do more of that, obviously.

And also, to eat more tacos and definitely watch more stand up comedy.