Monday, July 8, 2013

Consider Yourself Blocked

With the availability of social media, it has become increasingly easy to cyber-stalk your friends, your exes, your enemies, and even strangers if the mood strikes. And don't act like you're above Facebook stalking, because you're not. You know you have at least 5 people on your friends list that you don't delete for the sole purpose of being able to peek at their new photos or see where they checked in last Friday night. And I am just as guilty. In fact I probably have more like ten of these people on my friends list. Maybe 15. And I do use Facebook to cyberstalk...I would be lying if I said it wasn't one of the top 5 reasons I even have a Facebook account.

Admit it, sometimes it is just nice to sit at your computer with a cocktail and look at all the dumb shit your ex boyfriend has been up to since you dumped his lame ass, or who your formerly-best friend-turned-evil-bitch has been hanging out with since you threw a drink in her face. I take personal gain in seeing all the "it" girls from high school whose lips were attached to the ass of the jocks, who have since married said jocks, popped out a kid or two, and are now divorced. Yes, I am a bitch because I enjoy this. However, with as evil as these girls were in high school, trust me when I say, they had it coming.

As a cyberstalker, the most annoying thing that ever happends is discovering that you've been blocked. Blocked. Not hidded, not unfriended, but all-in, you-can't-see-shit-I-am-doing-online BLOCKED. I hate it. There is nothing quite as upsetting as searching for someone who you know has a Facebook page and not seeing anything come up. But what is even more annoying is when you are blocked, and then this individual suddenly unblocks you - they don't friend you, of course, but suddenly, at random, you can find their name and maybe a profile photo. Weird. You find yourself wondering, what did I do to deserve this gesture? Are they just trying to spy on me now? Are we mending fences? Is her most recent "episode" over?

And then, a week or so later...you're blocked again. What the fuck?! This has now become just a clusterfuck and you can barely see straight. You find yourself searching their name on a weekly, if not daily basis to see, when am I blocked as opposed to unblocked? Is this based on the full moon, or her menstrual cycle, or is it completely random?

There are 2 people on my block list, and I know of several block lists I am on. I have never once unblocked these 2 individuals. It takes a lot to get me to say, ya know, its not enough for my private profile to show when you look for me, I hate you so much that I don't want you to even know whether or not I still have a page. As if these two people even care, but you can now understand the trouble I've undergone to make my point. Unblocking them now would be like admitting guilt or fault or something. I don't think so!

Here's the thing. If you want to block me from your Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, MySpace, blah blah blah...go right ahead. But then don't get soft and undo your dirty work. Fucking own it. Yea bitch, I blocked you. And blocking, from my standpoint, is forever.