You're a Weak-Ass Bully

The definition of BULLY: a blustering, quarrelsome, overbearing person who habitually badgers and intimidates smaller or weaker people.

Let me just preface this blog with a reminder that, this is my mother-fucking blog, and I will say what I want, how I want, when I want. I am very aware of the consequence of voicing my opinion out loud (or writing it out loud, in this case). I don't need anyone to tell me to relax or let anything go, nor do I need to be told to be nice or to keep things to myself.

FUCK. YOU.

Fuck your bully-ass, manipulative bull shit. Fuck you for the way you speak to people, for the way you speak to your family. Fuck you for the way you use people, for the way you make yourself a victim by manipulating the people around you. Just seriously, fuck you.

I am so beyond done with the bull shit, it's insane. I cannot continue to sit idly by and watch people mistreat other people. If you are a bully, I will call you a bully. If you are manipulative, I will call you manipulative. If you are abusive or domineering or aggressive, or just quite plain FULL OF FUCKING HORSE SHIT, you're going to be put in your place for being a fucking ass hole.

FUCK. YOU.

Fuck you for ruining holidays, for tearing things apart just to be the winner of some bull shit stupid fight. Fuck you for crying and whining and being a big fucking bratty-ass baby, Like, for real, fuck you, you stupid ass holes.

Here's the reality. People are destroyed here. This isn't a moment where you have been hurt and we all need to bow down to you with apologies, begging you to forgive us. Ummm. Fuck you. You and your manipulation have legitimately destroyed other people. And you don't give a fuck. And you don't give a fuck because you're too fucking selfish to even see that you caused all of this damage. You are the one behind it all, and maybe it took us 10 years to figure it out, but we know now, and you're not going to continue to play the puppet master.

You can seriously, just fuck right off. Girl, bye.

And seriously, just like that I feel a little better about this insane lunacy.

Sometimes a girl has just got to vent, ya know? And today was one of those days, where I just need to type the word fuck like 35 times so I don't drive somewhere to pop someone in the jaw.

On a serious note though, it's awful to sit back and watch as one person tears apart ten other people. To sit and watch it all play out; to watch the lies, the bullying, the manipulation. It's sad to bring it up and be completely ignored (because God forbid someone take ownership in their part of anything). Sometimes, being the bigger person is really fucking hard. It's hard because usually, it requires letting go of relationships. When you stand up to someone who abuses you, you have to be prepared to say goodbye to that relationship. When you stand up for yourself, when you choose yourself over anyone else, it can really, really fucking hurt.

That is, until it doesn't hurt anymore.

Until it occurs to you that you're better now, that you win because you're no longer cowering to another person. It stops hurting when you learn how much better your life has become since you made a decision to just choose to take care of YOU. It takes a long time to get there. It takes a few steps forward, and then a few more back. Deciding you are more important than anything else, feels like trying to claw your way out of a wet paper bag. But trust me when I say, it's worth it.

If you're a bully, you can actually just fuck off right now.

And if you're the victim of a bully, stop letting that shit slide immediately, and just put yourself at the top of the list. You matter so much more than any bull-shit dumb-fuck weak-ass bully, who literally is only picking on you because they hate their own life.

How sad is that??

Just. Go. Love. Yourself.

And fuck off to the people who would rather just crush you than let you love yourself. #boom.

#BrockTurner, That White Guy With the Dead Eyes Who Can Do Anything He Wants

I will certainly not be the only blogger to write about Brock Turner. I wasn't the first, nor will I be the last. And for a few days I've wondered if it is even worth the trouble, because every blog post I've read so far, has already made my points. Everything I've read is spot on with my own thoughts on the situation...so do I really need to write my own post? Or should I just continue sharing the ones I've read? Is it really worth writing?

Of course it's worth it. Because every post that is written about the blatant rape culture that took place with this case, is another opportunity for it to fall on a new set of eyes. Whether it's on Buzz Feed or Huff Post, or on CNN or a local news station, or if it's on my unknown blog on Blogspot - if one additional person sees it, then it was worth writing.

The back story is not needed; you've all seen it. Brock Turner, the model student athlete who was recently charged, convicted, and sort of punished for sexual assault. The jury, who found him guilty on three counts, without question. His dad, who basically agreed that he did it, but argued that there was no need to punish him and, you know, ruin his life as a swimmer. The judge, who apparently agreed that he shouldn't be punished for it. And the young woman, who's voice was not heard in court, and for whom there was no justice. Another young woman blamed for her own sexual assault. Another young woman asked why she was so drunk, why she was out so late, why she was wearing that sexy little top without her sweater.

What happened here is not surprising in the slightest. Brock Turner is white and wealthy, and he has a douchey rich white-guy name. He's a good student, and he goes to an accomplished university (insert sarcastic hand job motion here, because, who fucking cares). He gets good grades. He has a douchey white-guy hair-cut. He apparently knows how to swim. And he can do whatever he wants.

Because if you're white enough, rich enough, and athletic enough, you can do whatever you want in this country. And if someone should tell you that you cannot, your white enough, rich enough daddy will come along and say, oh yes you can, son, you can do anything you want.

And apparently, "whatever you want," does in fact include, ramming your dirty fingers into an unconscious woman's vagina and then dry humping her limp, noodly, passed-out body until someone comes by and makes you stop.

If you have not already read the victim's letter to her attacker, you absolutely need to, by the way. She shares terrifying details about what it is actually like to be fingered and dry-humped while unconscious, and she discusses in grave detail what it is like to need a rape kit in an emergency room. For those of you without a vagina, I can assure you there is nothing pleasant about anything inside you that you don't want, or are unprepared for.

This case has so many moving parts that I have struggled to even keep myself grounded as to which part I am so pissed about. Am I mad that he did it? Am I mad that he tried to argue that she consented? Am I mad about the comments under countless articles that blame the victim for being hammered? It's hard to keep tabs on my own anger, because really, I am just so mad about the entire thing, from start to finish! This woman went to a party with her sister, where she got drunk and may or may not have been dancing with a guy she didn't know.

Something every woman I know, has done, by the way.

She then finds herself in the emergency room getting her lady parts swabbed and photographed, after at some point she leaves the party, passes out, and winds up naked in the dark behind a dumpster being assaulted by a guy she doesn't know.

She is then, of course, blamed by these internet troll creeps for being drunk and slutty. Like every chick who gets hammered at a party deserves to wake up in the emergency room without the panties we had on just a few hours prior. And then, to make matters even worse, a fucking super-expensive, over-paid, creepy defense attorney sits in court, and under oath, blames her too! And then to top it all off, this fucking judge, who's sworn duty is to protect her, lets this little douche bag off with 6 months in county jail!! WHAT?!! How does this make any sense? How is this rational? How is this happening?!

Brock Turner is not a Stanford student.
Brock Turner is not a champion swimmer.
Brock Turner is not an all-American athlete or an exceptional academic.
Brock Turner is a sexual predator.
Brock Turner is a rapist (note, yes I do know he didn't actually rape her - however I do believe with all my being that had he not been stopped by two guys on a bike ride, he would have).
Brock Turner is a privileged, spoiled, catered little bitch, who has never been told no and who truly does believe he can take what he wants from anyone.

Brock Turner is what is wrong with America. He is why women don't go out alone. He is why we walk to our cars with our keys out, ready to stab one into someone's eye. Brock Turner is the reason we are worried about being drugged, why we worry about what we wear when we go out. He's the reason we take friends with us to the bathroom. He's the reason we have mace, the reason some of us have guns. Brock Turner is the reason women are defensive, the reason we are mean and unapproachable.

Brock Turner is the reason that women are scared of men.

Brock Turner's dad is the reason for Brock Turner. Dads who raise sons to take what they want, when they want, how they want. Dads who let their sons believe that if a woman passes out drunk, you can still move forward with banging her. Dads who don't teach their sons that no means no, and that the only permission you have to put your dick in someone is the word YES, from her conscious mouth.

Brock Turner and his father are the reason women in America will continue to be blamed for their own rapes, the reason we will continue to wonder what we should have done differently to have avoided being assaulted.

And Judge Aaron Persky, who's job it is to protect women in America from men like Brock Turner, is the reason Brock Turner will be the spoiled, entitled white kid who gets a slap on the wrist for rape.

Slap on the wrist. 6 months. For sexual assault. For sexual assault with the intent to rape.

Let that sink in while you're reviewing his swimming statistics and wondering if he'll be okay now that his dreams of swimming in the Olympics are dead. And then stop giving one single fuck about him, and shift your attention to the actual victim, who got no justice, and who will live the rest of her life a little bit more afraid of men than the rest of us.