Five Thousand Dollar Dinners

Have you ever sat down and added up the amount of money you spend on frivolous shit each month? More specifically, on food and drinks from anywhere other than the grocery store?

If you aren’t prepared to make a change in your dining habits, don’t. It will just make you feel bad about yourself.

But if you are prepared to make a change, to start spending more wisely and making better food and drink choices, the first thing to do is pull your checking account statements and add up every swipe from a Starbucks, 7-11, Walgreens, or bar/restaurant/night club. It will blow your mind.

And not in a good way.

I recently read a blog someone had posted on Pinterest that said, basically, that if you stopped going out to eat, stopped ordering lunch in, and stuck strictly to consuming foods purchased at the grocery store, you’d save enough money to buy a round trip plane ticket to anywhere in the United States…every month. Yes, every month. A round trip flight every single month.

No fucking way. There is no way.

But then my curiosity got the best of me. What if she was right?! What if I was really spending that much dining out every month – I mean, I do like to have Jimmy Johns and Thai Terrace delivered occasionally, and I do enjoy a good happy hour. I was convinced she might be right. So I very, very doubtfully pulled my checking account statement for February, March, and April of 2016.

Mind. Blown.

She was right!

I took into account every purchase from mini marts (Pepsi and white cheddar popcorn), Starbucks, and restaurant and bar. I accounted for every food or drink item I paid for with my debit card for 90 days. I did not count the food or drinks I bought while on vacation in Phoenix – part of being on vacation is always bars and meals out, so I don’t think that should be accounted for. And then I averaged the totals and was floored to discover that I have been averaging $450 a month in lunches, dinners, snacks, and happy hours. FOUR HUNDRED FIFTY DOLLARS A MONTH!! That’s more than a thousand dollars a month, people! That’s $5400 a YEAR! On food and beer!

For comparison sake, you should know that I eat lunch out maybe twice a week – usually Jimmy John’s, because I get busy and they deliver a lettuce wrap to me the moment I realize I’m hangry. And I would say I eat out maaaaaybe once a week; usually sushi on a Saturday with my roommate, or Thai food. I am not, by any means, eating three square meals a day at a restaurant. It’s not even close to a daily habit.

But it costing me five thousand dollars every year.

I committed to a 30 day challenge starting today. I’m not going to dine out for the next month, nor will I grab Starbucks or a soda on my way to a movie, while I’m out shopping, or in the middle of a bad day at work. I am committing to eating and drinking only what I purchase at the grocery store or farmer’s market from today until my weekend road trip on June 10^th. My goal is to put that $450 that would have been spent on food, into my travel jar. Because let’s be real, all I ever want to do is take vacations. And I’d rather make my own lettuce wrap and jet off in a plane once a month than eat Jimmy John’s at my desk.

To keep myself focused and in line, I started thinking of all the things I could do with an extra $5,400 a year, and seriously the list blew my mind. I could go to Europe. I could go on a local trip every month all year long. I could live in a nice apartment without a roommate. I could finish my sleeve, tattoo my other arm and both legs. I could start a very expensive drug habit.

Okay so the last one isn’t something I’d actually do, but you see where I am coming from. The fact that I ever complain about money while I am simultaneously spending five grand on sushi and beer, is insane.

I really encourage you all to do the same. Tally your frivolous food tab, and commit to cutting it down. Even cut it in half, just to see if you can do it. The reality is, not only will I be saving a ton of money, but I’m sure to see positive changes in my weight and body size, as well as my overall health and well-being. Eating at restaurants is generally not good for you. You eat way bigger portions of non-organic, unhealthy food. You make choices you wouldn’t make at the grocery store, like appetizers and desserts. You are more likely to have a few beers instead of a glass of wine at home. In general, eating out as often as we do, is not good on our bodies or our pocketbooks. So I am looking forward to this next month, to see how much money I have to waste on other things.

Like shopping sprees with my roommate, to buy clothes that fit better after I lose weight from not eating at Panda Express.

Money Can't Buy Time

At this time five years ago, I lost both of my grandparents, within just a couple of months of each other. It was a hard period of time for my family, and continues to be an emotional time of year for me. I miss them each individually, but I also miss the way they fit into the tight knit dynamic that is ever present in our growing family.

My mom's parents were amazing people. When we were little, they played with us, went sledding with us down their steep driveway in the snow, let us come over, fed us well, and filled our lives with memories that I still think of fondly. As we grew up and they moved to the coast, they allowed us to come visit, spend time, camp out in their yard, and bring armies of friends, boyfriends & girlfriends, and pets with us for weekends away from Portland. There was no shortage of love, quality time, or laughs in their house, and it quickly became my favorite place to spend weekends after I was able to drive and had a car of my own. 

Would you rather: Have more time, or have more money? 

At this time every year, I wish I would have had more time to spend with my grandma and grandpa; this one is simple, really - I would rather have more time. 

Where does money really get you anyway? Is it a necessary evil to survive, to pay bills, to feed & clothe yourself? Of course. But it is the root of any happiness? No, not at all. I mean, I suppose it contributes - without money, life would be pretty bleak, and I would argue that in the past year or so that I have finally had more of a disposable income and more ability to both spend and save, things are less stressful. But money certainly does not buy happiness on any level. 

I am far more concerned about the time I spend with people, than what I am spending to do so. I don't need to go out to dinner or see a concert, or to take lavish vacations in order to enjoy the company of someone in my life. I am often content to lay in silence in my boyfriend's arms after a home-cooked meal (yea, I make food sometimes now, it's a new thing). I enjoy long walks outside with my girlfriends or dinner at home with my mom & dad. There is more to life than things you have to pay for, and often times the ones you don't have to pay for end up being the best ones anyway. 

For the cost of half of a tank of gas in my '91 Toyota Tercel, I was able to spend years of weekends with my grandparents while they were here; I can't imagine not having those memories, those stories to think over when I visit the beach house now that they're gone. It didn't take a lot of money for me to have those weekends, to sit on the couch and watch TV with Grandpa, or to take a walk on the beach with Grandma. But it took time. Time I could have spent with friends or at the movies or at the mall. Time I preferred to spend with my cousins. 

Money doesn't buy anything as important as time. Sometimes that best thing you can do for yourself, is to make time for yourself, and then to make some time for someone else. Because in the end, you won't have any of the stuff you spent your money on, but you'll be able to find peace in knowing that the people in your life knew you valued your time with them.