Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Go. Be Good at Something. Even if its Porn.

When I graduated high school and started college, I wasn't quite sure what I wanted to be "when I grew up." I knew I loved books, and I knew I was a talented writer. I was confident in my ability to write a great essay, to read a book from cover to cover in one night and then stay awake to write about it. I toyed with the idea of teaching, but I think you have to have some serious drive for that, and I didn't. I went to college leaning towards wanting to study Library Science and to become a children's librarian. What ended up happening was, my dad got cancer, and I fell so behind in one term that by the time I was caught up and he was healthy, I just wanted the fuck out of school. So I graduated with a degree in Arts and Letters, which is Portland State's uppity way of saying, writing. I knew I could write, I knew I was good at it, and I knew that writing is beneficial to any career I would end up with. Besides, I still didn't really know what I wanted to "be," other than, done. with. college.


I have a job now that I am good at. I don't hate it and it will likely be my career long term (or at least until I find a sugar daddy who lets me lounge in my jammies in a window seat with hot chocolate and a notebook). You know that scene in The Notebook, where he builds her a painting nook in the house, upstairs in the quiet, where the sun comes in, and she sits there with coffee, naked, painting? Replace the coffee with a smoothie and the easle with something to write on, and that's my pure bliss. Where is Noah from The Notebook when I need my dream fulfilled?


Post Topic: What are you freakishly good at?

1. Kissing.
2. Sexting.
3. Making my friends feel better.

Kissing. Ok, I know, everyone says they're a good kisser. But sometimes they are lying. I know because I have kissed a few boys in my lifetime, and many of them who claimed to be the best kisser, actually just plain suck at kissing. You know you're bad at kissing when the person you are kissing is content to kiss forever. That sounds backwards, but its totally true. If you are good at kissing, the person you are kissing will soon want to not be just kissing, if you know what I'm saying...you know you're kissing a good kisser when your body is reacting to simply the kiss. I can't explain it I guess, but you shouldn't ever just be like, oh hey we're kissing. This is where I would like to write, I know I'm a good kisser because every boy I kiss wants to have sex with me. LOL. But that sounds seriously not right. And maybe I don't even kiss as good as I think I do. But what I do know is, when I kiss a boy, I pack a punch. So there's that. If you want further explanation, you'll have to smooch me I guess...


Sexting. The next time someone asks me what kind of writing I want to do, I'm going to have to say I a going to start writing erotica. I can seriously write a dirty text. I have had more than one girlfriend ask me to forward them messages I've sent so that they can practice their sexting. Is this something to brag about on a public forum? Eh, probably not. But you're good at what you're good at. And I am good at making texting dirty when it needs to be done. College tuition money well spent. How am I using my college writing degree? Writing dirty 140-character-at-a-time messages, duh. Oh you thought I'd write the next great American novel? Nah, not my style...sorry mom.

Making my friends feel better. I have recently decided that I should no longer be a property manager. I should be a therapist. I have several friends going through some upsetting shit lately, and I seem to be the sounding board...and don't get me wrong, I am by no means bothered by that. I am lucky enough to have seen a therapist and to have taken a lot of big lessons away from it, and if I can save my friends the copay by regurgetating the information I learned, then its a win, right? In all seriousness, what I am good at when dealing with friends needing someone to talk to, is that I can appreciate when someone does or does not want advice. Sometimes people come to you just because they need to vent, and when that's the case, I know not to offer any gems from therapy, but just to let them be mad or upset or sad. And then other times, when a person is asking me what I think or what they should do, I know I can offer some advice or another perspective that maybe they haven't considered. I think the most important thing you can offer your friends is legit, true support. It isn't support if there is judgement behind it. It isn't support if there is anything behind it other than loving support. What my friends decide to do with their lives is up to them; the best I can be for them is a sounding board and moral support - and the best I can do for them is support them in their choices.